The Little Things

Have I mentioned how lucky I am? I have never thought that I was a particuarly crafty or creative person. Sure, I can put a bouquet together to bring to a friend's party. I can pick out a nice pair of earrings to go with a particular outfit. I can cook pretty well. But I don't necessarily have the patience or the coordination to manufacture the items that people "oooh" and "aaah" over. Hence, my short-lived career in jewelry making.

That's why I am so very fortunate to have crafty, creative and patient family and friends.

On Sunday, several of my lovely wedding ladies, as well as my mother and aunt came over to help me put together favors and guest gifts. One my aunt's had already generously put in a great deal of time in the creation of the favors. My mother and I had been shopping around town for months for the little bits to tie it altogether. I didn't particularly care about the angle of this or the amount of that and that's why I am lucky. My friends took charge and I just gave the nod of approval and before you knew it (after much food - we never do small amounts of food in my family - and a little bit of wine), they were almost all assembled. They also look adorable and they are exactly what I envisioned.



After a week of feeling uber stressed about work, apartment issues and the lack of time to get everything done, an afternoon with some of my closest was exactly what I needed. A few hours of laughing and being surrounded by love and support was just what the wedding planner ordered.

And by wedding planner, I mean me.

Do We Really Need Them?

So despite having heard a myriad of horror stories from various friends and acquaintances regarding the printing and assembling of their wedding programs, we very wisely chose to print and assemble our programs ourselves. On Friday night, Arthur and I penned what I believe to be a very cute, very appropriate, very us wording for the programs. We even found graphics, etc. to go with the theme. I was not a little pleased with our efforts. And then? And then we started the printing process. We began the attempt at roughly 10 PM on Friday. It is now Sunday evening and still the demon cardstock remains as pristine as when first purchased. Damn Martha Stewart and her "living." Damn the craft store that had those blasted things on clearance. And damn my own attempts at being frugal.




And you know you are in trouble when in the FAQ section, we have the following: Q: How do I know if my programs will print correctly? A: You should test it out to see if it will print correctly. End of story.

Sigh.

I won't be broken by these things. Good will triumph over evil. The righteous will conquer the unworthy. I will prevail.


Or we won't have programs. Perhaps, a herald or two instead?

Pineapple Martini Night

AKA My Bachelorette Party.

Well, my friends truly out did themselves in the planning my bachelorette party. Without giving away all the details, I am going to summarize what was one of the best night's of my life.

4:30 PM. I arrive at Samia's apartment (two buildings from mine) for a glass of wine and some cheese and pate (yummy-o).

5:15 PM. Janette arrives. More wine.

5:30 PM. We jump in a cab headed downtown. Janette and Samia decide they want to tell me what the night we be and then make a lot of stuff up. I don't buy it.

5:50 PM. We arrive at Central Bar. There is a table area reserved for us. I drink two extra dirty martinis.

6:45 PM. It is revealed to me that the DVD montage that Arthur created for me is not going to be shown due to technical difficulties. Very graciously, the hostes at offers us free shots to soften the blow. Then some magical Irishman gets it working. We still have the shots. The DVD is awesome. I laughed a lot and Arthur, as always, did a wonderful job.

7:00 PM?. We big our walk over to Lafayette street. I still have no clue what is going on.

7:15 PM. We arrive at the New York School of Burlesque where we are greeted by Gal Friday. She hands out long gloves and boas and teaches us several moves. She is fabulous. We are all excellent at it and decide to create our own burlesque club. Ok, that's not true. We do put tassles on our ta-tas and learn how to shake them. I am a pro already.

8:30 PM. Another cab. We get out at DBGB. I spot Tiki Barber in the very crowded dining room. We are shown to a private seating area. The hostess tells us we are their first bachelorette party. I am pretty sure this was our cue to take off our clothes or go find a stripper. We did neither. I feel that we disappointed her. In any event, we had a prix-fixe meal and the menu read, "Andrea's Bachelorette Party." The food was delicious and we all drank a lot of wine. We were also able to dock our own ipod, which was fun. The women all went around telling their first/favorite memory of me. It was so sweet and I, once again, realize how lucky I am.

I also get a tour of the kitchen, which was super cool. I still dream about the ice cream sundae....

11:00???PM: We take another cab to the Fat Black Pussy Cat. I am immediately accosted by a very drunk young man with very tight fitting clothing. He dances me around the room several times.

Then I order a pineapple martini. A bachelor party arrives. I am asked if one of the party can give me a lap dance. I say why not. He's embarassed, but it is funny. Some one of their party offers to buy me a drink. I ask for a pineapple martini. We dance a lot more. The boa continuously comes into play. Two more bachelorette parties show up. I don't like it. Not one bit. I dance go-go style on the table with some extra large gentlemen. More boa.


At one point, Janette, Eugenia and I go up to the bar and do about three shots because someone buys them for us. Then I get another pineapple martini. We dance a lot more. Another gentleman asks me to borrow my sash. I say ok, but then want it back. He buys me another pineapple martini. More dancing. More boa.

3:00???AM, I arrive home. I decide that since I hear Arthur move that he is awake. I perform my burlseque for him. Then, I pass out.

Altogether fabulous.

RSVP = Respondez Vous S'il Vous Plait (LET US KNOW IF YOU ARE COMING OR NOT!)

I have hear a lot of stories from various friends and acquaintances with regards to their wedding guests showing up/not showing up/bringing extra people/bringing uninvited children, etc.

I am not sure about what will actually happen on the day of the wedding yet (I'm hoping someone won't just show up or that friend x won't bring her five children - we actually don't know anybody with five children, but I like to use exaageration to my comedic advantage), but I do know that I find some guests lack of clarity as to their attendance very strange indeed. My response to their responses or absence there of:

A) Save the Dates were sent out in March
B) Wedding invitations were sent out at the end of July
C) RSVP date was clearly September 1st.
D) There was a response card on which one only had to check off attendance or regrets and write their name.
E) There was a stamp on the outside envelope of the response card (all you have to do is put it in the mailbox. You don't even need to seal it really. It isn't a secret).
F) After I have asked you about it 4 or 5 times, maybe you could come up with an answer.
G) No, I will not make your hotel reservations for you.
H) Yes, there are taxis in Long Island (we've had 'em here since 'round-a-bouts 1995, I s'pose).
I) Please don't be surprised that there is no vacancy at the place I explained only has 25 guest rooms six months ago.
j) At this point, you would have had to make dinner reservations for October 3, let alone respond to a wedding.

Ok. Glad to have gotten that out of my system.

Bachelor Party

Arthur has had his bachelor party. By all accounts it was a fun, shot-filled, laughter filled, gambling filled, afternoon/evening/morning of debauchery.

When I mentioned to people that Arthur was having this oh so many of wedding traditions, there was often a look of "oh, no! Are you ok with that?"

What is there to be ok with? How could I not be ok with it? I was not worried in the least when I kissed him farewell and told him to have a good time before he went off. I love and trust my future husband. If I didn't, then I would have absolutely no business marrying him.

In any event, I thought it would be fun to type up the text messages that I received from the boys the night of Arthur's bachelor party. Imagine these intermingled with my soon to be brother-in-law's facebook photo updates (mostly of himself).

Arthur: Heading out now. Ready for boobs, booze, and um, some gambling word that begins with boo, maybe bookies?

One they were on the train to Atlantic City:

Arthur: We are on our way. Love you and early apology for the night.

Friend #1: I'm sorry too.

My brother: Me too.

Future brother-in-law: We are all sorry.

My response: I feel those were insincere apologies at best. Have fun. Tell all I say hi and have fun and that they are not as sorry now as they will be!!! P.S. Remember mine is next weekend.

Arthur: I do. Bryan by the way just spilt beer. Funny.

Arthur: Friend #2 is close to being thrown off. :)

Friend #1: Not sincere??? I resemble that!

Me: You sure do!

Friend #1: You know we'll take care of him... :-)

Friend #1 Anyone know where we can get a hooker in Atlantic City? (Found out later that this text was NOT meant for me)

Me: I might have a few numbers. What did you have in mind?

Friend #1: You baby...come on down! Can you handle a donkey? Cause we paid a lot of money to get him there.

Arthur: Please give Friend #1 those numbers. It's for the other guys.

Arthur: Drunk already. Not off train. One thing for certain: love you so much. More love messages later!

See. Nothing to worry about.

Four Weeks and Counting

Some things that we've accomplished since my last post.

1) Arthur has a lovely suit.
2) Thanks to one of my loverly best women, hair and make-Up trials have been successfully accomplished. In fact, as I type this, I have more make-up on than I own and glitter in my hair. Might be xnaying the itter-glay.
It's been a while since I last wrote about our wedding preparations. Things have been moving along at lightening speed at this point.
3) Flowers for the bouquets and corsages have been purchased.
4) Most people have RSVP'd (but not all...it has a stamp on it, people!)
5) I have had two out of three of my fittings. Let me tell you, when I purchased the dress I thought it was wonderful, but after the seamstress worked her magic....I absolutely am head over heels in LOVE with the dress.
6) MOTB dress and shoes purchased
7) Wedding Jewelry purchased.
8) Presents for the women in the ceremony party have been purchased.
9) Gifts for those who are travelling purchased.
10)Finalized rehearsal dinner venue and put down a deposit on it.

As you can see, we've been busy, busy, busy wedding bees.

I want to it to just be here already. Four weeks seems like so far away and yet I know it will speed on by. I also find myself getting more and more excited about the big day. I worry that I am getting overly wrapped up in a lot of the craziness - both in my psyche and through my expenditures. My mind is more singularly focused on this day than I had anticipated. Luckily, my job does not allow the complete bridal machine take over of my mind. Yet, I find myself continuously handing over the credit card to buy "just one more" thing to make it "perfect." I am not perfect. Arthur is not perfect. In fact, we are pretty perfectly imperfect. I need to stay grounded and hold true to myself and remember what this really all about. Arthur finally getting health insurance. I kid.